99 Puzzle Peices.
Hello readers sorry I haven't written in a while its that I have been sort of busy doing things and getting stuff ready for major changes.I have also had a very eventful two weeks. and my 100th blog post is coming really soon.
I will tell you whats been happening lately and I think I owe some people explanations about my disappearances and my lack of communication.
First I will like to start with One of my best friends. Dario. I do miss him every single day... I want to call him and tell him everything about whats going on and about all the cool stuff I have been up too and about every single little funny thing that I know he will crack up about and then probably choke because it was what he always did when I said something that caught him off guard. He is an awesome person and a very dear friend in my heart and it will always remain that way. I think he thinks that I left because he wasn't the best... but he was.. he truly is a one of kind guy and I know he felt more for me than I did for him that's why I had to go, I didn't want to hurt him. I am crying as I am writing this because I really do miss him and I do want him to know I am really sorry.
Secondly, I would like to say that people from my past have been trying to communicate with me... I will start off with Ahmed... I know all about why he LEFT me... to return to his ex and his two children and that's totally cool with me I admire him for sacrificing his happiness for his kids. He called me the other day and we had a good conversation about how we were doing and all but that's about it nothing too big. Then comes Armando which requested me once more... I should have denied the request because he is after all a person who hurt me very badly but I like to put things in the past and keep them there, I forgive whatever it is that he has done to me and also for calling me a dumb fuck as told to me by Pedro which was told to him from his ex Paula which she heard directly from his mouth.... but like I said I am a very forgiving person but trust me he is forgotten. He sent me a message after I did approve him. He said in these exact words Copied and pasted: just wanted to make sure you were doing ok. take care. miss you ......... and that was that I never responded I never even felt a bit of anything towards it just read it and kept moving right along.
Thirdly, I wanted to talk about Mabelle and how much she resembles me not only in the way she looks but in how much passion she has for certain things how much we go through the same things despite of our age differences. To me we are equals, two of a kind I can tell her anything in the world and I know its safe. She is not only one of my bestest friends but she is also my cousin, my family , my sister. We take care of each other that's just how it is.
Fourthly, <---yes i will keep doing that... Annabelle My best friend, my other sister, my partner in crime and my other half who always understands me as well she always knows she always listens and shes always there helping me through it all she is the one that I admire the most. She takes life and if it messes with her she messes with it.. lately I do feel like there is something wrong though like there is something that she doesn't want to say. I can tell, I always can.
Fifthly, I decided that I don't want a relationship, I don't want to date, I don't need distractions to get in the way of my goals and achievements and I want to go back to school which I am going to do so very soon. I am also making a business plan outline because I don't want to be working for no one else but myself and that is another big issue. But when I get there I will deal with it. I have been organizing my life and things are looking brighter each and everyday. My smile and shine is back I am happy. Truly happy and I know what I want and I know where I am going... I know things can change in a minute but for now I like this good feeling and I don't want it to be taken away any time soon.
As off now I am going to the gym every single day and training 3 people not for money but because it makes me happy maybe one day for money but not right now. I am down to 109 pounds (remember I am a tiny person.) My goal was 110lbs by December but I guess I have been working out harder than I thought. I have also been reading more and more I just go through them... I like the fantasy world in it the world that I can pretend to be the character. I have placed myself in these characters and i have truly cried because all in all they are put in the same life situations we all do, especially when the situations hit close to home.
I also want to talk about my sister, she is a good sister who doesn't want to see me hurt but she has a tough personality all in all I would always do more for her than she for me but that is okay because I love her so much and that is the way big sisters are supposed to be... right? Protect the little one, even though she should have been the older one she sure ass hell bosses me around a lot.
Well for today I have written enough. and I hope this blog explains why I haven't been writing but I will write more often now because Its another release that later in the future I will re-read and laugh about or cry about or learn from.
And one thing is for certain I will never stop being a good person no matter how much crap life throws at me there is no excuse.
Love you guys.
Miry
4 comments:
Post a Comment